


think of better days to erase how i’m feeling

by fitemehwanghyunjin



Series: let’s make amends.♡ [4]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety Attacks, Heartbreak, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Recreational Drug Use, chan smokes weed, high school sweethearts minchan, hyunho best friends, idk what else to tag, inaccurate depiction of college, minho is anxious, not edited, they’re not too bad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:54:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25291222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fitemehwanghyunjin/pseuds/fitemehwanghyunjin
Summary: Minho quietly opened the front door and his heart sunk and how prominent the smell was in there. Chan was smoking again. He closed the door as quietly as he opened it and set his duffle bag down on the floor by the door. Minho noticed an extra, unfamiliar pair of shoes by the door and he froze.Did Changbin get new shoes?
Relationships: Bang Chan/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Bang Chan/Yang Jeongin | I.N, Han Jisung | Han/Hwang Hyunjin, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Series: let’s make amends.♡ [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1716289
Comments: 3
Kudos: 77





	think of better days to erase how i’m feeling

**Author's Note:**

> title inspiration: better days by brody ft. 93feetofsmoke

Minho had a bad feeling in his gut since the moment he had woken up and gazed upon the sleeping face of his boyfriend of seven years. 

Chan was sleeping peacefully- a little too peacefully if you asked Minho. In all the years he had known Bang Chan, his boyfriend who was notorious for his ability to function properly without very really sleeping, had never slept that peacefully. Well, not unless he had: 

a. taken his melatonin, which he hated for some odd reason (and they'd tried both the pill and gummy versions) or

b. he had gotten as high as a fuckin kite, which he promised Minho he'd stop doing when they graduated high school.

And from the smell of his hair, Minho just knew it was the other option. He quietly huffed before pushing Chan's (stinky) curly bangs off his forehead and pressing a light kiss there which made Chan's eyes flutter open.

"Good morning, Channie," Minho whispered softly. His boyfriend gave him a soft smile and grabbed his hand, pressing his lips to Minho's palm. "I have to get ready for class but we have something to talk about okay?"

Chan nodded in understanding and kissed Minho's palm again. "Have a good day, angel." 

The younger smiled softly at his favorite pet name, the bad feeling in his gut going ignored, and ran to the bathroom to take a quick shower. Once he was dressed, he kissed Chan's sleeping head and grabbed his duffel bag, heading to the front door of their shared apartment.

"Bye Channie! Love you !" He paused and waited for a response, his eyebrows furrowing when he didn't receive one after a minute. Maybe Chan went back to sleep? Though highly unlikely, Minho didn't have anymore time to spare. Pouting, he walked out the door and began his trip to his first class of the day.

And sadly, that bad feeling in his gut seemed to grow with every passing second.

——————

The day seems to be going by in a daze for Minho. He barely remembers what happened in his lectures and now he's tripping and stumbling so much at dance that the instructor called a recess. The instructor tried to make it seem like he noticed everyone 'seeming fatigued and 'in need of a water break' but Minho knew that it was his fault for being unable to get simple moves together.

"Minho hyung?" The redhead immediately looked at Hyunjin at the sound of his name. "You're spacing out." The blonde stated, taking a seat next to him on the floor. "Are you stressing about our performances next month or is something else plaguing my best friend's mind?"

Minho snorted lightly and leaned into the taller, resting his head on his shoulder. "Don't worry about it, Hyunjin. It's nothing."

Hyunjin shook his head. "Y'know, a wise man once said to me 'I don't believe that'. I know something is up, hyung. You could literally nail this choreo in your sleep. So wanna tell your best friend why you seem to be dazed today?"

Minho playfully tapped his chin as if he was thinking and Hyunjin lightly shrugged him off, making them both . "I woke up with a bad feeling is all," Minho eventually said, staring at the water bottle in his hand.

Hyunjin nodded. "How bad of a feeling?" He asked softly, rubbing Minho's shoulder's.

"A real bad one," The older responded with a shrug. "Chan got high last night and didn't tell me he loved me this morning. It's really not that big of a deal yet I can't help but think that I somehow upset him enough for him to break his promise to me." Minho gripped his hair roughly and took a shaky breath. "Maybe he's mad because we haven't done it in a while? Or maybe I said something cruel without noticing."

Hyunjin was silent as he watch and listened to the redhead. Normally, that would be appreciated but Minho suddenly felt way too anxious because of it. If Hyunjin thought he was stupid for reading into this too much, he must be. 

"Hyung," Minho looked up at Hyunjin again. "Breathe for me okay? I'm gonna tell the instructor that you're not feeling well and we're gonna go get some air. Take some deep breaths for me." Hyunjin gently removed Minho's hands from his hair, squeezing them in reassurance before letting go. "I'll be right back."

Minho nodded and took deep breaths, focusing his attention on twirling the ring on his finger. It wasn't an engagement ring (though Minho hoped it would become one someday) but a promise ring. Chan had given it to him when they graduated high school and promised to upgrade it when they finished college. 

A gentle hand on his head caused him to flinch slightly before glancing up to meet the concerned eyes of both Hyunjin and their dance instructor. "You ready to go?" Hyunjin asked softly.

Minho nodded and stood up, grabbing his duffel bag and cellphone. "Sorry for inconveniencing you," he stated softly to their dance instructor. 

The instructor simply shook his head. "Go get some rest Minho. I hope you feel better soon."

Minho thanked him and apologized once more before allowing Hyunjin to silently escort him out of the building. They walked to the campus garden and sat by the fountain there. There was a nice breeze and Minho took a deep breath, instantly feeling more at peace in the silent environment.

"I can see now why you're so good at helping me when I'm on the verge of a panic attack," Hyunjin joked with a short laugh after about twenty minutes. Minho shrugged, but smiled nonetheless. "You feeling a bit better?"

"Yeah I am," Minho answered, looking up to make eye contact with Hyunjin. "Thank you, Hyunjin."

Hyunjin smiled brightly at Minho and lightly bumped their shoulders together. "And for the record, I don't think you're dumb or anything for being this worried or anxious about this feeling you woke up with." 

"You don't?"

Hyunjin shook his head. "Not at all. But I think you need to have a heart to heart with Chan hyung about how you've been feeling today."

Minho took a deep breath and nodded, pulling his phone out of his pocket to text Chan. Only Chan had already texted him forty five minutes ago.

**channie babie ('ω')** : hey angel. i'm working with changbin and jisung so i won't be available to talk right after you finish practice but we can definitely get dinner and talk after 

Minho couldn't help the small smile that graced his lips at the sight of the pet name. He glanced at Hyunjin. "Wanna hang out? Chan says he's with Jisung and Changbin right now so I'm free."

Hyunjin's eyebrows furrowed. "It's Thursday. Jisung just got out of his art club not too long ago and is supposed to be meeting up with me so we can get him more paint for a special project he's working on."

And just like that, the bad feeling in Minho's gut amplified by a thousand.

"Oh?" He glanced back down at the time stamp of the message Chan sent him. "I actually have to go home, so enjoy your time with Jisung."

Minho stood and slung his duffel bag over his shoulder and began speed walking in towards his apartment building, which was about five blocks away from campus. He could feel his heart pounding in his ears by the time he had reached the elevator and his hands were shaking so much he almost couldn't his floor button.

When the elevator dinged open, the first thing that hit him was the strong smell of weed that he could only pray wasn't seeping into the hallway from his home. He walked to the front door and twisted the knob, sighing in relief when he realized it was unlocked. They never locked the door.

Minho quietly opened the front door and his heart sunk and how prominent the smell was in there. Chan was smoking again. He closed the door as quietly as he opened it and set his duffle bag down on the floor by the door. Minho noticed an extra, unfamiliar pair of shoes by the door and he froze. 

Did Changbin get new shoes?

Not even bothering to take off his own shoes, the redhead walked to his shared bedroom and flung the door open, only to have his heart drop at the sight. 

There was Chan, in all his shirtless glory, sitting on the edge of their bed with a joint in his hand. But that wasn't the worst part. The worst part would be the barley dressed guy laying in their bed, eating a snack. Both were covered in hickey's and when Minho got the courage to tear his eyes away from the bed and to the garbage can by the bedroom door, he spotted the used condom at the top. 

Minho closed his eyes tightly and without a word, he removed the promise ring from his finger. Fighting his tears, he walked over to Chan and placed the ring in his palm. Balling his fist, he walked out of the bedroom door and back towards the front door.

"Minho ! Angel ! Wait !"

Minho didn't know why he stopped walking. Maybe it was the use of his favorite pet name for the third time in a single day. Or maybe it was the desperation in Chan's voice. Either way he turned around and looked at his boy- looked at Chan right in his eyes.

"Yes, hyung?"

Chan winced at the word. "Min, it's not what you think. Jeongin and I-"

"I really don't want to hear anything from you right now."

"Just hear me out, angel."

Minho felt nauseous. His heart was beating too fast. He felt trapped. He needed air. He shook his head and ran out of the apartment, not even bothering to wait for the elevator and ran down the stairs. He ran. 

And he ran.

And he ran.

Until he couldn't.

There was no more adrenaline coursing through his veins and he no longer had the energy. And here he was, at a park that was a thirty minute walk away from campus. It was late so the park was empty so Minho walked to the swing set and sat down on one of the swings. 

Did that really just happen to him?

Did Chan really cheat on him?

Was that his bad feeling all day? 

Minho closed his eyes and started to swing himself. Slowly at first. But the more he thought about it, the angrier he got and the higher he swung. 

Chan cheated on him. He took his loyalty, his love, and his trust for granted. He broke his heart. 

Chan broke his heart.

"Minho hyung!" Minho's eyes shot open and fell upon Jisung, the small boy's eyes were frantic and full of worry as he stared at the older on the swing. "Hyunjin I found him!"

Minho slowed himself to a stop when he heard that Hyunjin was there. The taller boy came running from the other side of the park, flashlight in hand. When did it get dark outside?

Hyunjin ran to the swing and threw himself on his knees, wrapping his arms around Minho in a tight hug. "Oh Hyunjin," Minho whispered softly, rubbing his fingers through the others blonde hair. 

"I was so fucking worried, hyung." Hyunjin whispered back, his voice sounded hoarse like he had been crying or yelling. Maybe both.

Jisung walked behind the swing and wrapped his arms around Minho as well, an action that Minho was a little shocked by. Both younger boy's must've been so worried about him.

"Chan hyung texted me and told me he had fucked up bad and couldn't find you. He said that you weren't in your right state of mind and he told us that the last time he saw you look like that you tried to-"

Minho lightly shushed Jisung and leaned his head against the other's, nuzzling him softly. "I'm okay?" Was he?

"Let's get you home, hyung." Hyunjin stood up and Jisung let go of him, allowing him to get of the swing. The moment he stood, both Hyunjin and Jisung wrapped him in a proper hug, holding him in between them as the pet his hair and whispered how much they loved and cared about him. 

That was all it took for the oldest to break down, burying his face in Hyunjin's neck as he silently cried. He cried until he couldn't shed another tear. Until he developed a throbbing pain in his head. Until he couldn't stand.

Hyunjin and Jisung had somehow managed to get Minho on Hyunjin's back and they carried him back to Hyunjin's dorm. Minho wasn't unconscious but he definitely couldn't focus.

"Oh my god, Min."

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Hyunjin growled out.

"Hyunjin, please let me talk to him. I need to explain everything to him. Sleeping with Jeongin was-"

Jisung gasped. "You cheated on him?!"

"Yes but no !"

"That doesn't even make any sense!"

"Hyung, no disrespect, but you have about five seconds to get out of here before I kick your ass," Hyunjin deadpanned. Chan sighed and Minho could hear his retreating footsteps. He gently squeezed Hyunjin's shoulder in thanks. "I didn't know you were up."

Minho shrugged slightly and Hyunjin put him down and opened his door. "Can I shower and borrow some clothes please?" Minho asked softly when they stepped into the room. 

"Of course you can. You know where everything is at. Take your time. Sung and I will order you something to eat and then we can cuddle and watch movies all night long."

The oldest snorted and looked at Hyunjin and Jisung with teary eyes. "I'm sorry for intruding on you guys. I can go home if you need me to."

Jisung shook his head and grabbed Minho's hands. "You're not intruding at all, hyung. And you definitely don't need to go back to that asshole right now."

Minho nodded and went to take a shower, putting on a pair of Hyunjin's shorts and a t-shirt the younger stole from him. He joined the other two on the couch, sitting in the spot that the patted between them and smiling softly when they both latched on to him.

"Thank you." Minho whispered, tears slowly flowing out of his eyes again. 

"You're gonna be okay, hyung. We'll make sure of that."

Neither Hyunjin or Jisung disturbed Minho after he had finally cried himself to sleep, holding on to both of them like a lifeline.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading.♡


End file.
